the pain that throbs from within
comes from so much sin
golden clock ticking upon the wall
strike at twelve begins to fall
shattered glass peircing scream
life ripping at the seam
searing guilt floods out
gentle husband begins to shout
craze terror running in the street
looking down simple wife is beat
blood spilt agony stalls
children thrown from the falls
all quiet no noise
hate seekers finding poise
people turn look in fear
bloody carnage brings a tear
hand in hand pray together
violence no more no not ever
pact sealed all fun
coming out the beautiful sun
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wow. your descriptions are so vivid, it's almost like the reader is observing the actual scene in the poem. you pay a lot of attention to detail, which is good...i think you really captured the essence of domestic violence in this poem; i think that's what you were describing here. have you taken a creative writing class yet? i think you should. you really do have a way with words. it will help refine your natural talent :) i'm taking a creative writing class this semester. i'm pretty excited about it ^__^
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